i better hurry with this entry it's almost time for the big opening ceremony. it's going to be at the city park. we're all meeting there to witness the mayor chop down the oldest tree in the county.
it's the only one large enough to provide enough wood for the bonfire we're having later tonight.
it's a good thing we're having a bonfire, because due to lack of city funds (darn recession) we can't get more fireworks until the 4th of july. it's okay though, because someone on the city council came up with a great recycling idea. at 7pm, just when the final rays of the evening sun are hitting the town reservoir, the local trucking company is going to empty the old engine oil tanks into the water and we will all be able to witness the beautiful rainbows that the oil/water/sun create. it's going to be amazing to see.
besides, earlier today they held a contest to see who could make the longest chain out of those 6-pack plastic rings thingies, we all signed our names on the winning ring chain and it's going to be floated across the reservoir, through the culvert and out into the river that heads to california. it should be in the ocean by tomorrow night at the latest. we might all become famous. cool, huh?
after the sun goes down completely, we're all heading over to the park again. by this point the chili cookoff should be in full swing. one of my favorite events of the night is going to be the follow-up to this event. we had a local craftsman make a set of special "cow spoons" for the b-town cattle ranchers. they're going to hand feed all 3007 head of cattle the big pots of chili. we have the butane-powered lighters ready and waiting for the largest cow bluedart festival this side of dove creek. (ps...i put quote marks around "cow spoons" for the benefit of my friend, cristy. they were unnecessary.)
at this point the bonfire should be at the perfect stage for roasting. which is good, since all of our appetites were whetted from the chili we were denied for the benefit of the cows. some of the local high school boys went on a hunting trip for their senior trip. they brought back a schload of california condors, whooping cranes, woodpeckers, and spotted owls to put on a giant spit. yummy.
now, i know you're all jealous that you can't have such an amazing earth day celebration, but i hope you were still able to enjoy it somehow.
9 comments:
OH, I love you and your subversive humor.
I also may have posted about the bird killing plastic rings. They are awesome.
Thanks for making me smile (late at night, or really early in the morning when I should already be in bed).
You are too funny. Where in the world did you find that cow picture? The poor animal. And are you making fun of my enjoyment of unnecessary quotation marks? C'mon, Nel, you know they are hilarious and it isn't' nerdy at all to find them amusing. :-) Thanks for the laugh!
You're quite the character!
Seriously Nel...where do you come up with this stuff? You are awesome.
Only you could be so funny. I have been out of town to training so I did not know you had called. I am trying to go walking everyday not that it is warming up so we will stop by again another day.
LOVE LOVE LOVE reading your posts....and how do i get a fun picture from you.....i know i know i should have done your pay it forward.... maybe max and lily need one for their play room and they are too young to have payed it forward...
Your blog brings so much laughter into my house! I LOVE it! Where in the world do you come up with this stuff! Thanks for the tears of laughter you gave me today! Love ya!
I can't believe I live in Blanding and I didn't even get the 17 page flyer. I missed the whole thing. Dang!
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